A few months back, I decided to backpack solo. Now, this would not be my first solo trip as an African woman traveling solo, but it would be the first time I travel through 5 African countries with a just a camera, a laptop and a backpack big enough to fit a baby inside.
Most people, family, friends, and people I met along the way out of concern and sheer curiosity made the following statements that I have since decided to debunk in this post:
1. “You think this is a lifetime experience? One day someone will get you pregnant, and you will settle down.”
I think this has to be the funniest comment for me hands down.
Myth: Parents do not have time to travel
Reality: I may not be a mother, but I sure do know lots of parents travel with their children. I may not know how they do it, but it’s a thing I look forward to in future.
2.“Do you travel alone? Who takes your pictures then?”
Myth: You must travel with someone
Reality: That one person might back out last minute then what? Cancel all your plans? That can never be me. If you want cool pictures to ask people with cameras, most likely they are travelers too and will want you to take photos of them as well.
3.“I cannot believe it. Your partner lets you travel alone?”
A young Singaporean man I met when we had gone swimming at the devil’s pool made this comment. Now, everyone was in a group or coupled up. He was there with his girlfriend too, and I guess he felt the need to ask why I was solo. He went on to add, “I can never let allow my younger sisters or my girlfriend to travel alone.’’ The fact that he said allow though. Ha-ha!
Myth: Women are not supposed to travel on their own, especially those in serious commitments.
Reality: Solo travel is for everyone and anyone interested in it. What if your partner does not like to travel? We are in the two thousand and nineteen, the year of our Lord so I do not see what’s this about women not being “allowed” to travel on their own? What’s this? The 12th Century?
4.“You do realise this is a white people’s thing?
A Malawian I had just met in Lilongwe said he had never met an African woman backpacking. He went on to add, “Look around you Rioba, everyone in this hostel is white, in case you had missed it.”
It’s true that most of the backpacker’s hostels I stayed in had mostly white people. Sometimes I would be the only black person. It would be so hard to miss me, what with my Melanin radiating throughout. Ha-ha. Some became my friends; some asked me if I spoke English and others just stared at me.
Myth: backpacking is a white people’s thing
Reality: Traveling is for anyone and everyone. My number one rule of travel is to go solo I can’t find someone to travel with me. Make the world your runway and prosper!! No seriously though. PROSPER!
5.“ Why are you traveling alone? Are you going through the quarter-life crisis?”
Myth: People that travel alone are going through something or are in search of something.
Reality: Not everyone traveling is starring in “Eat, Pray, Love”. Some travelers want to experience the feeling of living in foreign cities; others want to know what it’s like to be part of a different culture; others go for the food and beaches. Some want to hike up the Mountains like Kilimanjaro or the Himalayas. Simple! Age, heartbreaks and, soul searching for do not usually have anything to do with travel.
6.“How much money do you make to afford to travel?”
This comment came from a close friend of mine accompanied with “Were you part of the squad that hacked KCB bank recently?”
[Tweet.“How much money do you make to afford to travel?””]
Myth: You need to be paid lots of money to afford to travel. If not, you need wealthy parents or affluent brands to sponsor your trips.
Reality: While the above is the case for some travelers, none of the above applies to most travelers.
First of all, most of us are budget travelers, call us stingy even. The idea is to always look for cheap flights, cheap accommodation, affordable travel destinations, ideally, cheap everything to afford to survive on the road.
I know several travelers give up a lot of things to save up for their travels. They rearrange their lives and make travel a lifestyle.
7.“Wow! You are brave. Are you not scared? Will you be safe?”
Safety is a genuine concern and to be fair; I was a nervous wreck when I hit the road. I even contemplated carrying a pepper spray or a gadget for protection such as a taser. The fact that last year I was in Zimbabwe during the coup did not help my case.
Myth: Travel, especially for women is not safe.
Reality: Most places in the world are not safe. For real, the CBD of Nairobi is like Gotham city.
The bottom line is you cannot stay locked up in the house because there are big bad wolves out there to speak.
If you decide to travel alone, you are not supposed to let everyone know you are on your own. The smart thing is always to trust your instincts, meet people in public places and avoid roaming in the dark. You realize these are the same principles we apply in our day to day lives. Nothing changes, the world has people with bad intentions, but also there are also great hearts and beautiful minds too.
Read more: How To Be Safe When Travelling Solo
8.“How many leave days do you have? Must be a lot?”
Myth: You require lots of leave days to travel
Reality: A lot of free time would be awesome, but not everyone can afford that. The trick is to plan your leave days strategically at the beginning of the year. By strategic I mean, booking leave around less busy days at work or around public holidays.
Read more: 7 Ways to Maximize Travel with a Full-Time Job
9.“Are you crazy? You won’t be bored and lonely?”
I will go the Sheldon way and say, “No, I am not crazy, my mom had me tested.”
Myth: You need to travel with a group of people to have fun
Reality: A lot of factors come into play when planning a trip with a group of people and most times people do not make it. It comes down to you either travelling alone or not travelling at all.
Traveling solo is not everyone’s cup of tea, but best believe I have had some of my best experiences of my life through solo travel. Linda Matama, one of my favorite traveler from Kenya likes to say ‘A lot of things scare me, but I do them anyway.
Imagine not seeing this beautiful world because you are scared?
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When i starts travelling with Jowi i will tell you about it ???
I cant wait
Nice post, in the last one I also would say, if you travel alone, the chances of make new friends and know people are much higher.
PS. Im texting from Uganda, Im mysolo backpacking trip here 😉
Have fun Arnau! Martha and I plan to raft in Jinja o er Easter.
You have a valid point. How long are you staying in Uganda? Have fun!!
‘ngojea uzae tuone kama utazurura!!’?but whyyy? seriously though, if people knew how cheap it can be to travel!!!
Go girl!! Give us more travel goals?
haha..humans! Thanks love
Go girl!! cheering from the sidewalks coz as much as I know you are living my life lol..soon getting over my fear though.
you will and you will see how intense it is. It is worth it though
This article has such relateable truths! I might do the questions I have received as well, some time.
I know right? I cannot wait to see your post. Do it!
My biggest impediment would be #7 if I’m being honest. Loving your journey, keep giving us those travel goals 🙂
it’s not bad at all. you tend to meet people along the way and honestly it’s fun interacting with the locals of the place you visit
Nice read. Some of those questions though!!!
PS. Nominated you for BAKE awards. Hope you are shortlisted
oh wow!! Thanks Judith! I had not even thought of BAKE! Thank you so much for believing in me
Nice read….Go girl
Thank you Susan!
Wow, just what i needed to start travelling.
I’m glad to hear this. Happy travels!
This is amazing!
fifi!! Thank you
I want to see the world too. Not sure how but you’ve made me see its possible
glad to hear that, all the best.
wow rioba l have spent most of my morning reading your blog and am so impressed.
i think we have alot of similarity and same perception about life.
invite me along for your next adventure
I sooo relate to these questions/comments.
Right? Travel is life though
Totally enjoyed reading this post😊
Thank you for reading 😊